I put You to my test;
Yes, I judge and scrutinize Jesus.
No, please don't get me wrong,
it isn't a bad thing or "sin" to examine everything.
Not even Your creator and His happenings.
"Test me in this,” says the Lord Almighty,"
says Malachi 3:10a.
So I did.
Why, the gift to think and consider,
is given from above to be used for above.
If we think that we're regular products of procreations,
If we're unaware that we are made of unrealistic phenomena,
If we've forgotten no knowledge and science yet found can explain our existence,
we forgot who created us.
We forgot what we were created for.
I scrutinize and learn about You, Jesus,
and all the things You do.
Forgive me, I've been a mean critic indeed;
I provide for You no bias or tolerance factor.
Back then I put You equal to all variables - life, knowledge, supernatural happenings;
My independent variable: existence.
My dependent variables: procreation, safety, natural instinct, supernatural happenings, knowledge, Jesus.
You were nothing but my dependent criteria.
Firstly I doubt,
but then I gained shocking understanding.
I put Your words to my realm and put everything else to test,
I put my life timeline on the table
and double-check, cross-examine it;
in the hope my faith will not be made of false hopes and formed of extraordinary events,
but the other way around.
And hopefully my life is of great contemplation,
that my experience of You stand firm in faith and understanding of the Scripture.
I put You to my test,
to find out
You were the mastermind of the project itself.
-SK
